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Monday, January 12, 2015

Grief process and the long road to recovery

 I saw this today and it rang a bell of familiarity with me.
“Grief can impact all spheres of a person’s life. Some will feel angry and reject previously held beliefs, while others may find comfort in their faith or spirituality. You may experience grief not just for the person, but also for your expectations in your relationship with them that were never met.”

For me, I am finding that anger is still an integral part of my traumatic and complicated grief process.  This accident not only took Timothy physically but it took all my hopes and dreams;  it took our future too, and left me with this awful flashback of what happened to him.   I know he did NOT intend to leave me, my heart however feels like he walk out on us.   I was sitting this morning wondering how he could do that to me and then I think that sounds selfish and I get mad at myself for feeling that way.  Too many different feelings.  The day before was a good day.  Yesterday I just felt sick to my stomach and I want to crawl in a hole.  I get very conflicted sometimes just thinking about it.  I have no patience for anything or anyone.  I am realizing that much of this is a defensive to keep me from experiencing this pain again.  I KNOW it is not healthy and I will try to work every day to move further down this road to recovery.

For anyone experiencing grief OR knows someone that is, you may find this helpful.  It did for me because I thought I was crazy because had NEVER experienced most of this in my lifetime and all the sudden I did (some at the same time).

What are the physical, mental, and emotional symptoms of grief?
While symptoms vary widely from person to person, there are several physical, mental, and emotional symptoms that are commonly experienced in the grief process.
Physical symptoms include:
·        Headaches and body aches
·        Tightness in chest
·        Fatigue or exhaustion
·        Sensitive skin
·        Dizziness
·        Shortness of breath
·        Increased illness
·        Oversensitivity to noise
·        Heart palpitations
·        Loss of appetite or weight gain

Mental symptoms include:
·        Forgetfulness
·        Sleep difficulties (too much or too little)
·        Inability to concentrate
·        Confusion
·        Decreased decision-making or problem-solving abilities
·        Low self-image
·        Self-destructive thoughts

Emotional symptoms include:
·        Depression
·        Anger
·        Helplessness
·        Anxiety
·        Mood swings
·        Hysteria